The Day Before The Day

So the other day Katie posted on Facebook a quote that she heard on one of her favorite shows Switched At Birth.  The quote was "That's the thing, the day before your life changes forever just feels like any other day."

The day before Christian drowned started out like any normal Thursday, but ended differently then most.  My schedule at work had recently changed which meant that I was going to be able to spend more time at home on Thursdays.  This particular Thursday was the first Thursday that the kids were not in school for the summer.  I was excited to get home and spend some time with them.  Katie was going to take Blessing and her friends out for Blessing's birthday.  I decided that I would clean up the backyard.  Christian, Victoria and Evie were hanging out in the backyard and helping me out.  We got everything looking pretty good, so I went inside for awhile.  Then I decided that I wanted to run to Meijer and get some sand for Evie's sandbox.  I went outside where Christian, Victoria and Evie were playing basketball and told them to get in the car so we could go get some sand.  So they all hopped in.  As I was turning around in the driveway, I ran over a basketball that they didn't put away.  I thought it was no big deal, so I kept on going.  As I pulled out of the driveway my car started sputtering and almost stalling.  I pulled over to see what was going on, when I looked under the car, gas was pouring out.  I quickly pulled back in the driveway and parked.

Now keep in mind that this was rusty piece of crap car that Christian absolutely hated.  It was loud, ugly, and the passenger door didn't always work, so he would have to get in from the drivers side.  Anyway, turns out that the basketball broke one of the gas lines, so gas would just pour out.  I was pissed.  The car may have been a piece of crap, but it was my main mode of transportation.  I proceded to yell at the kids for a good five minutes saying things like "This is why we tell you to pick up after yourselves." And, "Now how am I supposed to get back and forth to work, we don't have money to get this fixed."  Then I just sat on the trunk of the car for awhile.  The girls went off and played and Christian was just sitting on the base of his basketball hoop.  I remember texting Katie things like my life sucks and why does this stuff always happen to us.  When she got home I even remember saying to her that it felt like God was testing us.  If only I would have known what the next day would bring.

So the reason this day ended different then most was because of what Christian said to me about twenty minutes after the car broke.  I was inside the house and had calmed down a bunch.  Christian came inside and said that he was sorry and that I could have his money to help fix the car.  Now Christian wasn't the best at saying he was sorry, it did not come easy to him at all.  Christian also really liked to have money and was kind of a miser when it came to spending it.  So for him to say those words were HUGE.  I told him that it was an accident and we would figure it out.  I was so proud of him for taking responsibility.  I thought that he was finally starting to figure out how to apologize.

So that is it.  The day before the day.  It is forever stuck in my memory.  I have forgotten so many other  days, but this one is fresh, like it happened yesterday.  I relive it often......it was the last day I got to spend with him.